


Times that will never come back

by elveataur-writes (madswritings)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2017-05-30
Packaged: 2018-11-06 20:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11043810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madswritings/pseuds/elveataur-writes
Summary: You love Barty with all your heart but after his imprisonment you only feel sorrow. When you are allowed to visit him you tell everything you want Barty to hear except for one thing.





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> This is a pseud for all my old works that were written on different blogs as I moved around Tumblr.  
> All works are not re-read or edited (and therefore are probably crap). I don't even have ALL my works anymore so this pseud is a storage account for the fics I still have.  
> My main writing account on Tumblr is now madswritings.tumblr.com

Barty always had a way with words, even when you both were still students. You were in Ravenclaw and romance between two houses wasn’t something unique but that wasn’t that common either. You loved him and you knew that he loved you, but something was burdening you even back then – his interest in the dark side. Of course, you never thought that he will make any drastic measures to join the forces, but his fascination with power was almost evil and obsessive.   
You tried talking with Barty from time to time, but he always assured you that he just want to know the enemy, to be prepared, to know more and don’t be afraid. That way he calmed down your suspicion and worry. But it wasn’t enough, because deeply in your heart you felt that something will happen.  
And you were right in the end…  
________________________________________  
You enter the corridor leading to Barty’s cell. They don’t want you to visit him often and this is a second visit while he’s already two months being locked up. You still love Barty, but now he’s in Azkaban. Why? Because he actually turned to the dark side and joined Voldemort, but now no one calls him like that – everyone is afraid and so are you.  
Dementors are watching you, making you feel desperate to get out but you have to meet him. Finally you stop in front of the metal bars. Behind them you see lying Barty. His back is turned to you. You step closer, wrapping your fingers around cold metal bars.  
“Barty?” You whisper and he flinches, then slowly raises and turns to you. He looks terrible. Dark bags under his eyes, he’s like human shaped hanger for his prison clothes.  
“It’s you.” He gives you little weak smile and moves to you finally placing his shivering fingers on yours. “You didn’t have to come here.”  
“I did!” You protest and Barty smiles sadly to you.  
“I’m glad you came.” He exhales and you feel rubber ball in your throat.  
“Why, Barty, why?” You ask desperately and you notice flash of anger and arrogance in his eyes, but that passes in a second. He lets out a sad sigh.  
“Because I believe in what I believe. I know you don’t understand and I don’t blame you. I’m just happy that you’re not in here, not locked next to me.” He presses his lips to your fingers and you feel like crying, but somehow you swallow it.  
“Barty, I’m scared.” You mutter and he looks into your eyes, looking even sicker that a moment ago. “You look bad. I’m worried.”  
“I know.” He reaches out through the bars and cups your cheek. For a second he just looks at you. “You deserve so much better. You deserve a better man than I am.”  
“Don’t. Don’t talk like that.” You shake your head and kiss his palm before he retreats his hand. “I’m with you and I love you. I don’t want anyone else except for you.”  
Barty sighs heavily.  
“And what about the future? You can’t wait for me. They will never let me out of here.” He admits and you want to collapse on the ground and sob, but somehow you manage to stay standing.  
“I don’t care. I will fight for you.” You promise and Barty gives you another sad smile.  
“Thank you. But you must go now. Dementors will affect you badly if you’ll stay any longer. Go.” He leans his forehead against the bars and you can’t’ hold back, so you close your eyes and kiss him. When you pull back he steps back from the bars.   
You look at him once more before turning and walking away. One hand lands on your belly, protecting the growing life inside of you. You weren’t’ brave enough to tell him. Maybe next time.


	2. II

You don’t know if you even should be here with the condition you have. Being pregnant and in Azkaban - this isn’t something that you could hear often in one sentence. Yet, you had to visit him again. You know that you can’t stay for long, because even if you tried to search anything about dementors and unborn babies there wasn’t anything about dementor’s effect on them and you simply just can’t risk it.  
You quickly pass the other cells while you try to hide your face under the hood of your big cloak. You chose it intentionally because you still are not sure if you should tell Barty about the baby. Not many good news are delivered to the Azkaban, nor it sees many visitors, but you know that you have to do something. If not tell him – at least visit him.  
Slowly you reach Barty’s cell. View didn’t change much from last time you were here. But this time he looks like he was waiting for you or at least someone. He glares at you angrily just before you take off the hood and then his anger changes into a smile. He jumps on his feet, but you instantly see how weak he is. He drags his legs to the bars just to see you a little bit closer and smiles trying to reach out for you. You step forward with a smile and place your cheek against his cold and rough palm.  
“You came back.” He whispers, but suddenly his arm leaves your face and he’s angry again. “Why did you came?!” You hear anger and desperation in his tone, but his eyes are not mad. You know he cares for you.  
“How can I not? You are locked up here and I’m all alone out there.” You grab the bars and the coldness of it surprises you. Barty just looks at you and heavily sighs. His shivering fingers lands on yours and rubs them gently.  
“You shouldn’t come here. Dementors… Dementors will make you desperate. And because you are living out there what is giving me hope.” He presses his lips to your knuckles and you just look sadly at him. You must tell him. You must.  
“Barty, I had to come. I wanted to tell you something.” You mutter still not feeling brave enough. Barty raises his eyes to you.  
“What is it?” He whispers.  
“I’m…” You lower your eyes and inhale. “I’m pregnant. And obviously it’s yours.” You try to smile but it ends up as a painful smirk. Barty stares at you speechless and you wait for him to react until his eyes darts to your belly and you pull your cloak away just enough to reveal the proof of your words.  
“But…” Barty gasps and you give him more time to get used to the idea. Finally his eyes rise up to yours and he even laughs. “But this is wonderful!” He glances at your cloaked belly and then back to you. Suddenly he frowns. “You must escape London. England is not safe.” He mutters and you look shocked at him. Innocent laughter leaves your lips.  
“What are you talking about, Barty.” You ask. To be true you knew that something dark is about to begin, but for the sake of your baby you tried to avoid anything that might hurt you physically or emotionally. It’s enough for you that Barty is in the prison.  
“You know what I am talking about. War is coming. You must run. Protect our child.” He reaches out through the bars and gently, with the tips of his fingers, he touches you.   
“But you will stay here. And I won’t be able to visit you.” You try to argue, but Barty pulls back his hand and anger twists his expression.  
“Are you stupid enough to stay here? Are you really that stupid?!” He shouts and you step back scared of this sudden change in him. “Flee! Flee because that’s all you can do!”  
“Barty, don’t talk like this.” You whisper feeling how tears gathers in your eyes and slips down your cheeks.  
“If you are too stupid to understand it by yourself then let me explain it to you!” He gestures all around him. “You are visiting a Death Eater!” He laughs and you cover your mouth with your palm. “You want to risk your life and stay in London because of a Death Eater!” Suddenly he grabs the bars again and brings his face as close as he can. “And you know what? I really hope that He Who Must Not Be Named will win. Oh, I really do hope.” You can see hints of madness in his eyes and unconsciously step another step back.  
“Barty, stop.” You whisper through your fingers, but Barty only laughs and you can’t stand it anymore. You turn and run away. He’s gone mad in Azkaban, he’s gone mad because of dementors, you know it.  
Once sound of your steps fades out Barty drops on his knees while heavily panting. This little show just cost him a lot of energy and he doesn’t have much left of that either. Heavy and painful sigh escapes Barty’s throat.  
”Maybe now she will run and be safe.”


End file.
